Fat Girls Show off Baby Bump

Just like Natalie Portman, Melissa Rycroft, Kate Hudson, Jane Krakowsk, Pink, Laura Saltman, Jennifer Connelly, Rachel Zoe, Christina Applegate, Amy Poehler, and a whole bunch of other people you've never heard of who are Hollywood Stars, these fat chicks have decided to show off their baby bump to the world. Scroll down for pics.


As an aspiring nursing student at Stevens Hennigar and a part time Walmart stocker, this fat chick decided to strut her stuff on the red carpet and show off her emerging baby bump. "People as me all the time how I maintain my figure while pregnant," she reported. "I still get I.D.ed at bars."

Possibly the most anticipated pregnancy of the year comes from this fat girl, reportedly fathered by Tom Green. "I am so excited to be having a baby with Tom," the fat girl gushed. "The media exposure has been great for my career. I have already read three new scripts this month."

Another muffin topped girl having a baby was interviewed by Access Hollywood of Black Swan. "I just enjoy eating, okay? And, by the way, I AM NOT PREGNANT, YOU BASTARDS!"

And, a couple more gratuitous pics of fat girls.

Life is grand.

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• Rachel Zoe Shows Off Her Post-Baby Body in LA! (popsugar.com)
• Video: New Mom Rachel Zoe Takes Her Stylish Little Look-Alike Shopping! (popsugar.com)
• Kate Hudson Opens Up About "Tempting Fate" For a Pregnancy With Matthew Bellamy (popsugar.com)
• Will Arnett cast in Christina Applegate's NBC pilot (insidetv.ew.com)
• Christina Applegate: Comedy Pilot with Will Arnett! (justjared.buzznet.com)

Disgusting -- 221 Million Dollar Apartments in London

Every so often, I think that humanity is actually going to make it, that we are going to grow past our savage stage. Then, I see videos like this one. Look at how rich assholes live in London, buying 10 to 221 million dollar apartments while over a billion people survive on less than a dollar per day.




This video makes me mad for a few reasons. First, there are people starving to death in the world, millions of them. 220 million would feed a lot of kids in Africa. Second, this is just conspicuous consumption at it's worst. Why can't these jerks live in a normal house like the rest of us? Third, and maybe the most offensive, the apartments in the video are just ugly. Look carefully when you watch the video. Is there anything in that apartment, anything at all, that looks like it's worth 221 million to you? If I am going to pay 221 million for anything, it better either have a super model that come with it, be made out of solid gold, or enable God to come visit me every day. And even then, the money could be better spent.

Related articles

• Most expensive apartment in the UK sold for $221 million dollars! (blahbethany.com)
• Sold: $221 million apartment - unfinished (msnbc.msn.com)
• These Are the World's Most Expensive Apartments [Video] (gizmodo.com)

Lady Gaga -- Marilyn Manson's Gay Cousin

We here at Future Twits have observed, with astonishment (not!) Lady Gaga's announcement that she is in fact gay. What type of announcements do the future hold for this flamboyant and ugly pop star? Lets find out:

Lady Gaga Twitters for January 17, 2009

@Whalehumper: After my revelation to Barbra Walters that I am, in fact, bisexual -- and that Barbra was once my father before turning to the dark side -- I've decided to put everything hidden about my self out on the table.

1. The first time I made out with a guy in a car, he asked me to wear a bag over my face.



2. I am not a hermaphrodite, in the strictest sense. I actually glued a Jimmy Dean sausage to myself when I was eight and have left it there over the years, even despite the frequent rat attacks and awful smell.

3. My nose originally belonged to Michael Jackson and was glued in place to cover up damage from an earlier car accident. I hope no one noticed.

4. When I was born, the doctor slapped my mother. Then he kidnapped me, hauled me to a Catholic church, and was shot by police while trying to stab me on the altar. Is this a sign, maybe?

5. With my videos, I can honestly say that people like my music. This is because no one, and I mean NO ONE, would watch my videos to see me. I make little children cry.

Normally, we put pictures of our article victims . . . er, subjects in the article. In this case, we thought it best if we went a different route.

Top 10 David Letterman's "Interns"

Consider David Letterman. His appetite for women is superseded only by the jokes that he so freely makes at the expense of others. Sadly, neither are funny.



However, we at Future Twits are not here to judge Letterman for his voracious and often strange appetite for the opposite sex (although he should have been able to do better than this) but to celebrate his womanizing David Letterman Style









Top Ten David Letterman Interns:





10. Shia Labeouf's Mom













































9. Oprah



































8. Legolas







































7. Selma Bouvier





















































6. Heidi Klum -- YOU WISH!!!















































5. Megan Fox -- YOU REALLY, REALLY WISH!!!













































4. The girl from bandcamp

































3. Maggie Gyllenhaal -- (she wishes)





































2.

Betty White . . . nah, too much class for you

1. Ann Coulter