As I was watching the romantic comedy two days ago "The Ugly Truth", I was struck by exactly how often Hollywood can recycle the same tired stereotypes about dating and relationships. So, I thought that I would post a few of my own "ugly truths" -- just to clear up the places where, once again, Hollywood got it wrong.
Ugly Truths about real life dating.
1. Most people are ugly:
Lets be honest here. None of the people in that movie would have much of a problem getting a date or relationship in real life. Any girl that looked like Katherine Heigl, unless she was a lesbian or wanted her boyfriends to wear diapers and suck on a pacifier when they made out, would have her pick of guys. Same thing for the two guys fighting over, her assistant -- even the semi-bald television producer. If someone has a job, isn't fat, and can read and write past the 5th grade level, they're probably ahead of the curve when it comes to the 40+ dating pool. It's the girls that look like Rosie O'Donnell but who are straight who have a hard time finding love.
2. Beggars can't be choosers
Maybe it's a sign of my sheltered upbringing, but most of the people I've ever met marry one of the first three people they date seriously in life. Unless both sides rich, stupid, or a complete A-holes, relationships where both people like and/or love each other work out in the end -- or at least for a few years. It's only in Hollywood that a non-neurotic woman dating a rich, handsome doctor would ask herself a question like, "Does he love me, or the idea of me." The rest of us have a job, and we can't worry about crap like that.
3. Some women like sex; some men don't.
This is one of the Hollywood stereotypes that always really gets me. I've known women in life that do things with people -- numerous people -- that I never thought were physically, anatomically, or socially possible. Conversely, some guys hate sex, or can't have sex (think Viagra) or just don't care about sex. I wish that, for once, a man in a romantic comedy would be portrayed with a moderate view of sex, instead of so over-the-top.
4. Most people don't make out in public
Hollywood seems to love throwing this stereotype into their movies, a la the hot air balloon ride and the "vibrating panties" scene. However, when you think about it, the whole concept of someone making out in front of you or having an orgasm in public is really kind of gross. Personally, I don't want to share in the sex life of another couple, woman, or even the animals on the Discovery channel. Those things are best kept private.
5. Most relationships don't have a dramatic "falling in love" moment
The formula for a romantic comedy always seems to call for a dramatic finish "falling in love" moment at the end of the movie, interspersed by lots of angst. To a certain extent, I can't completely dismiss this one, if only because movie relationships would be really boring without it -- like the Jim/Pam thing from the office. However, it seems like this is the way a lot of romantic comedies seem to try and save the movie -- a predictably dramatic (or dramatically predictable) finish -- usually leading back to lots of public making out.
